Hoooooorrrible Nightmare Ever!

This week is my most horrible nightmare for this entire year. I have two deadlines, which all the deadlines make me double-dead. My first deadline is the my internship final report. Thank you to Mrs. Priiida, for the horrible schedules and thank you again to the Kolokium Coordinator whoever you are for the hooorible schedule too. Now I am officially have Prida feeeveeerr.....Gee.

The bad part is I am changing my Kolokium topic, which is mean that I need to change alll the entire chapter, from Latar Belakang Masalah (what I should call it in english?), the theories (a lot of theories), and the Research Method. I need to work on it start from the scratch, from piece to piece and gather it into a beautiful but deadly kolokium proposal. Oh Mai God.

The worst part, is that I finally have to face what I hate. The funny thing is I found out this another life law - at least it always works on me , that what you hate will soon come back to you. Like in this kolokium, I convince myself that I won't and I will never want to "play" two variables in my research paper. For the example, you will have two variables if you pick a topic like " pengaruh x terhadap y". There you go, you have two variables. But I want to play safe by only put single variable in my topic like "opini mengenai x". That's one variable and simple. You don't need to analysis it with some complicated formula and else.

BUT...!!! Once again, my life law work well. I change my topic and I really have a heart in this topic. But yes, this topic is two variables and whether I want it or not, I have to make it two instead of one.

So the moral story of this nightmare story is....don't hate anything. The more you hate something or even someone, they will coming back to you. And like I said, at least that works on me. huhu.

As I struggle in this K class, I admit that sometimes I feel like I want to give it up. But I realize that I am allowed to do this crazy procedure with purposes. I also realize that there is no accident in this world and in this life. Everything were set from the beginning, and if we are allowed to feel something, some experiences even the bad one, that's because it has to be that way. I tried to connect the dots from my past and I am still amaze how even those bad experiences that I had made me become who I am today. I was put in Communication Faculty to meet Vipe, Nita, Yuni, Lili, Tansil, Vonny, etc. and I am thankful for that. And the last, believe that I was put in Husada Utama for my second internship for reasons. :) I don't know what are they yet, but as the time goes by, I think I will found out.

Anyway, I just want to say that everything happen for a reason, or maybe reasons!

We will never know what it is.

But just by believing that there is someOne who really have a bigger power in His hand to make everything happen or not happen, I think that's enough to be a life-time guarantee that our life are going just fine. :D

To my dearest and poor Kolokium friends:

WE WILL FIGHT TOGETHER!!! Owww yeaaahh!!!

key words: horibble, nightmare, crazy.

Different

Haiii good day everyone! It's November 5th and it's Novi and my brother's birthday, so HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU TWOO!!!!! all the best for you always.

Being different or doing something different or even maybe going through something different is not that easy to get through. I mean, if you going through something that different or not sound like familiar to your society, then you really-really need to have courage in yourself to keep going through what you are going through right now.

What I'm trying to say is I am going through, doing through, walking through something different than my society right now. And really it is not easy to get through it because it is not familiar or you can call it lazim in Indonesia (please don't intepret that I am going through something bad or weird, believe me I am not). I asked so many people about this and they gave me different opinions, each of them. Some of them said they good things even encourage me, which is good. But some of them react negatively at the first time they heard about my story and some of them react still negatively after that anyway. But at some point, I feel tired to hear all their opinions. Not because I don't like to hear what they say about this, it is just tiring.

They say so many things to me and especially to my head, and my thought is like being played by all those different opinions. Sometimes I agree sometimes I don't. Sometimes it make me have courage sometimes it is not. Sometimes I scared sometimes I don't.

And then I realize that I heard too much. I am afraid that if someday I have to make a decision, an important one, and I still heard those different opinions, my decision could be a decision that it's not what I really-really want - what myself really-really want.

So I start to close my ear, just being deaf for a moment. It doesn't mean that I am being stuborn then, but I just really-really want to think about it myself, to figure that this is really-really what I want, because this is me who going through this - not other people. This is my life and I know what the best for me.

People can say anything, opinions differ. But it is my life after all. So it is myself who I need to listen to.

Of course the consequence is that I need to have faith to get through what I already decided. It is not easy, but that the fact of life..you still need to move on. Every decision comes with consequences. If you already decide, then you have to accept the consequences too. That's a life's law. Sometimes it's not easy especially when you stuck in the middle of two or more decisions, which whatever the decision you make will lead you to some bad consequences.

But if you're not decide, your life is not moving on. You are not win or you are not lose. So if you have to face a decision, then decide it. But accept those with the consequences.

Anyway, yesterday was a good day. I went to Tretes with some of my friends and it was really really a one fine escape moment. The weather is good, the scenery is wonderfully beautiful, and the food is awesome. I went to this pondok? gubuk? I don't know what to call but this place has the best seafood in East Java. Well, not all seafood, actually they only have kepiting, udang, and ikan gurame. But those gurame and udang are great. awesome. tasty. Whatever you may call it. My favorite is gurame bakar madu and their udang bakar madu. Awesome.awesome.awesome.

Ooo...I've got an update. The name of the restaurant a la gubuk is Mang engking. Weird name, but wonderful food inside. Worth to try. Yuuuummmm..

Myself and Lili at The Taman Dayu - so damn beautiful (I mean The Taman Dayu.hehe)

Chirstmas is near!!

November is here!
Finally we reach almost the end of the year again and I always love to be around that time. Many good things are going to happen and many good things I expect to be happened in this month and the next month and the next-next months. Lucy are going to come home after almost a year not see her (I miss her badly), that's the good thing that will happen in the end of this month. Yay! And the other good thing I expect to be happened is of course the one and only long lasting pain and suffer of mine, the K thing. I hope I can pass this periode. If not, I will scream out loud. Well at least if I can not scream out loud for real, I can scream here, if that's OK. hoahoahoa.

The next month we will have a chirstmas celebration. I always love christmas. And I really want to celebrate christmas like those western people celebrate christmas. I've seen enough in the film or in DVD how American people get so excited to ceelbrate chirstmas. They go shopping for a big chirstmas tree, they buy chirstmas presents for the entire family and friends, they decorate their house (and the christmas tree) so beautiful, and the important part is...the warmth because of togetherness. The family gather, they share love and stories, laugh and happiness,hug and sing together, you know...do whatever the family tradition they have. With the snow outside the house and the christmas songs you can hear everyhere, it is just..lovely.
Well, I will never have a christmas like that because I live in Indonesia which this country doesn't familiar with snow and my family isn't a type of family who really have concern about christmas. So, what I can do at least is try to make my own chirstmas tradition, later, when I have my own family.

Speaking of having my own family, I recently watched this DVD series titled Brothers and Sisters. Vipe who introduce this to me. The series is about a family, or basically tell a story of relationship between brothers and sisters. And at the end the series showed how precious a family is. The series told me, personally, that at the end of everything, family is all you have. Family is the place you go home to. You will always find love, care, protection, advocacy, and support. Sometimes you can fight with your family, you can have a thousand different thought and argument with them, but at the end of the day, it is still your family you come home to.

Anyway, I've been addicted to something recently. It is called ayam tulang lunak in Indonesian. I don't want to translate it into english because it will sound creepy isn't it? This is...for me...is the bestest fried chicken in the whole world ever! Plus, you can eat it up until the bone of the chicken. It will make your plate come clean and there will be no bones everywhere.

Like I said, I am addicted to it. If I can, I will come to the restaurant everyday. I don't mind, really. But somehow I know it's silly. hauhauhauhau.

I like to introduce a blog, an all-about-health blog created by Dr. Adhi. So if any of you have any interest and big curiosity about health and stuff or maybe you are a health freak and always feel thirsty about health knowledges just visit his: doctoradhi

Be happy always, happy is a good feeling. Have a blessed month everyone!