Nov 28, 2009

Just In A Relationship

Hola everyone! Today is a foggy day and it is a perfect weather to get lazy at home. Anyway, enough about the weather chit chatting, I have a news to break. I am finally in a relationship with someone after almost five years I guess, being alone. And it's not easy to adapt to something that you rarely do or you did it a quite looong time ago. But unexpectingly, that thing happened two last night. he is one of my best-best friend and I've been closed to him for years as a friend. But maybe the timing was right or maybe the feeling was right, I don't know. All I know is we get close very easy, we knew each other for a very long time, and circumstances was right, and that led us to where we are right now.
For all this time, I always believe that God has a beautiful plan for me and my life. I always believe that whatever happened and whatever not allow to be happened in my life is in His hand. I always believe that He is the total control of this universe. And so I believe that the reason why He allowed me to be alone for almost five years is that He want me to see and learn from another person surround me, about how complicated human being are when they relate with another human being, how selfish they are, and how one human being fake themself to another human being just to show how good human being they are.
It's funny sometimes when I come up with this kind of know.."blaming" God for my aloneliness. But I always bring my feelings and desire of something I want to my prayers. He is the only one I'm not lying about my feelings to. And He really do answers my prayers, even if the answer is the answer I never expected.But really, no matter how hard I tried to have a
relationship with someone I like, I always successfully failed to have one.
So funny how this time, when I brought my feelings to my prayers, and I asked Him to open the way if He also want me to be with him, He really did it. Everyone look happy for us, and the most important is I already learnt a lot about how a relationship suppose to be -- give them wings to fly. It means that you have to let your couple being themself in front of you, not faking or being someone else they don't.
I believe this too: that at the end - at the very very end, it is very important and relieving if you know that someone you are with, is the one who can hold your hands and stay beside you no matter what happen, and they still love you for who you are, even if your world is crashing down.
All I'm saying is you better not in hurry to find someone. It is much more better for you to live alone, than you spend your time with a guy or a girl who doesn't fit you or you're in pain when you're wth them. It is good if you already found someone great and you get married ASAP. Then you're the lucky one. But for me, it's better if I wait a little longer to find someone I really fit with, then build my life together with him. The point is I don't want to regret anything in the future.
I remember one sentence my friend once told me. If you want to know your "jodoh" or whatsoever, find someone who can balance you out. Or in Indonesian you can say it: mengimbangi. And I think that's true. Not everyone can balance us out. So if you feel like you already found that person, what else do you looking for?